Published in Parent & Child Magazine, Singapore
Time is the most precious thing you own. Most parents nowadays work so many hours that by the time they get home, make dinner, clean up, and make sure the kids are completing homework, no one has time to think about playing games.
It is important to spend ‘quality time’ with your child. So weekends are recommended for family togetherness and game playing. And, it's a great way to break up the monotony of the routines. You can take cues from the kid on activities they find most enjoyable.
Games and activities do not have to be full day events; it is just as helpful to find time slots of even 30 minutes. Squeeze in a game of tag or a short jaunt to play on the swings.
Sushma Madahar, a child psychotherapist from Manteca, CA says, “It is crucial for parents to recognize age appropriate activities for children. This ensures their involvement and safety at all times.”
3-5 year olds
Young children have an abundance of energy, so encourage their natural tendency toward active play. Scheduling active family outings is a good idea for this age group. Visits to nature centers, parks, and other outdoor arenas are their favorites. Most kids also find climbing the Jungle Gym and sliding alongside their parent to be great fun.
“Interactive play is most enjoyable for 3-5 year olds,” informs Sushma. They are still learning motor skills at this age. “Parents should encourage kids to draw from their imagination. Remember to encourage their faltering steps with generous praises of ‘Good job!’ and ‘That’s great!’ You should also read with them, and sing with gestures which your child can copy and reciprocate,” she explains.
While they are not yet able to grasp the concept of games with complex rules, 3 to 5 year old children can easily learn Hide and Seek, Follow the Leader, Simon Says, and good old fashioned tag. Parents make perfect playmates and kids thrive not only on the activity, but the feelings of connection to the parent.
“Reading a book together is my son’s favorite activity,” says Harmeet Chhabra, Pune-based IT engineer and father of a 4-year old. “We also occasionally indulge in a pillow-fight.” He is teaching his son to write, in conjunction with lessons at Kindergarten. His kid enjoys nature, and loves to go out and play. “He often brings back twigs, pebbles and flowers,” adds Harmeet.
Sensory activities are by far the most attention-engaging activity for this age. Play with Play Dough and beading allows your child to play with materials in her own way. Join your child's play and follow her lead.
Pretend play accords your child to use their imagination. Dressing up as a nurse, teacher or a veterinarian offers your child a chance to try out these roles. Encourage her to invent new games and find new uses for materials. Use dolls, stuffed animals or household objects as props for pretend play.
5-7 year olds
By five most children have developed enough independence and understanding to enable them to cope away from home. As they move into the school years, their ability to understand and participate in a variety of games increases.
Sushma states that 5 to 7 year olds enjoy interactive and outdoor activities. “Along this age they have learnt their motor skills. So you can start engaging them in playing catch, bike riding and Four Square.” While reading with them, you can begin to infuse morals and values like sharing their toys, suggests Sushma.
Because they are so eager to please, children aged 5 to 7 are ideal candidates for parental sidekicks. Encourage your child to do simple jobs around the house that she can easily accomplish (like laying down the knives and forks). She can even help you wash the family car, pull weeds from the flower pots, or walk the dog.
Their capacity and desire to be helpful makes them cooperative to parental suggestions. Take advantage of this to foster the habit of exercise by enrolling in sport and athletic classes. You should not only encourage your children to run, swim, and climb trees – you should get out there and participate, too.
Mother of an energetic 7-year old, Arpita Nanoti a Communications professional from Mumbai enjoys spending Sunday’s preparing meals with her daughter. “We do some craft or DIY activity during the afternoon.” Arpita believes that these activities are an enriching experience, as they keep her child occupied, and she learns something new. “It is important, as you get to spend quality time with the child, and the child also enjoys whilst doing the activity.
7-9 year olds
By the time they reach the ‘middle years’ bracket of 7 to 9, you need to start according more challenging activities with your child. “This is the time of life when you must engage in confidence-building type of activities. Take your child hiking, engage in a sport, or suggest her to play an instrument,” advises Sushma.
Children are already learning social skills like team work at school. So, align your parenting activities with school activities. Museum visits are wonderful as they allow children to learn more about art and history while stimulating great conversation at the dinner table. Visit your local library with an educational theme each week (animals, seasons, human body, etc.) and have your child find books on the subject. Hold discussions regarding these themes – who knows, you might learn something new.
Even household chores can contribute toward burgeoning parent-child activity levels. Cleaning and tidying with you will teach them to be helpful and responsible people. “Don’t be fearful if they want to help you in the kitchen or garden; supervise them while they mix the ingredients, or weed out the plants,” says Sushma.
Focus on a few of your children’s hobbies – do they enjoy flying paper airplanes, collecting stamps or coins or making bird houses? “Engaging in arts and crafts, DIY projects, model airplanes and decorating doll houses are a perfect pastime for weekends with your child,” Sushma adds.
Volunteer at local non-profit agencies. Together, decide what agency to help– a children’s shelter, old-age home, etc. The benefits – your child will feel like they are really making a difference, while understanding how blessed they are in the process. Plus, it is a fun way to spend the day, meeting new people, learning new things and spreading joy.
9-year old Zahabiya Campwala from downtown Los Angeles loves to play hand ball outside their house with her mother. “We go to the beach, and play in the sand and water. I build sand castles with help from mom.” Zahabiya recalls the fair she attended with her mother and elder sister as the most fun-Sunday. “We played lots of games, and sat in joy rides. And best of all, mom let me eat cotton candy and ice-cream.”
9-11 year olds
Kids between the ages of 9 and 11 are no longer young children, but they are not old enough for teen activities. Your child is beginning to have a greater sense of who they are and learning their place in the world, so finding activities for them can be a bit of a challenge.
On the verge of teenage years, their physical development renders them capable of participating in a number of activities. They have developed a certain level of confidence in their athletic abilities, and you should encourage your child to find a few favorite sports or active games.
An inquisitive girl, 11-year old Ritika Menon of Mumbai likes going for grocery shopping with her mother. “Mom insists on cleaning my wardrobe on Sunday’s, before the school-week begins.” Mother-daughter duo always has a tussle on what clothes should be kept where. “There is great confusion and excitement when mom resolves that my old clothes need to be discarded.”
Take on a room improvement with your kid. Does he want to paint his room a new color? Maybe he'd like your help painting a cool mural on his wall or closet door? Construction and remodeling project are the perfect activities for 9 to 11 year-olds.
It's important for you to actively play with your tween. The child may roll their eyes at your frolics, but kids benefit from seeing that even adults enjoy active play and will certainly appreciate that you care enough to make the time to interact with them. Walks or bike rides are great too, giving you the opportunity to catch upon each other’s day and relieve any tension from the day’s responsibilities, promoting emotional well being.
Since friends are very important to kids in this age bracket, you may want to your children to invite a few friends along on outings to sporting events, hiking trips, or visits to zoos and museums.
The more time you spend with your child, the more you will be able to help him tune in to his abilities, skill-building activities, and healthy friendships. If you set fair rules and give your child the freedom that's right for her age, you most likely will be able to enjoy each other's company. Sure, life can be hectic. But don't forget, when it comes to spending time with your kids, the rewards can be great—for you and them.
